Starving student blames stingy host family
The Associated Press
HALLOWELL, Maine - Jonathan McCullum was in perfect health at 160 pounds when he left last summer to spend the school year as an exchange student in Egypt.
But when he returned home to Maine just four months later, the 5-foot-9 teenager weighed a mere 97 pounds. Doctors said he was at risk for a heart attack.
McCullum says he was denied sufficient food while staying with a family of Coptic Christians, who fast for more than 200 days a year, a regimen unmatched by other Christians.
But he does not view the experience as a culture clash. Rather, he said, it reflected mean and stingy treatment by his host family, whose broken English made it difficult to communicate.
"The weight loss concerned me, but I wanted to stick out the whole year," he said in an interview at his family's home outside Augusta.
Friends and teachers at his English-speaking school in Egypt urged him to change his host family, but he stayed put after being told the other home was in a dangerous neighborhood of Alexandria.
After returning to the U.S., he was hospitalized for nearly two weeks. The 17-year-old has regained about 20 pounds, but his parents say he's not the same boy he was when he left under the auspices of AFS Intercultural Programs.
"He was outgoing, a straight-A student, very athletic. Now, he's less spontaneous and more subdued," said his mother, Elizabeth McCullum, who was shocked when she met her son at the airport on Jan. 9 and saw he had lost one-third his weight.
Jonathan McCullum's parents said the exchange program should have warned them that students placed with Coptic families would be subject to dietary restrictions.
McCullum said his host family gave him only meager amounts of food, and his condition worsened during the last seven weeks, when the family observed a fast limiting the amount of animal protein he was given.
The host family was a couple with two younger boys and a daughter who was in the U.S. on an AFS exchange. McCullum said the parents gave him the smallest food portions, hid treats in their bedroom and complained that the cost of his upkeep was more than they spent for their daughter when she was home.
The host father, Shaker Hanna, rejected McCullum's story as "a lie," suggesting that he made it up because his parents were hoping to recover some of the money they paid for his stay as compensation.
"The truth is, the boy we hosted for nearly six months was eating for an hour and a half at every meal," Hanna said. He added that the boy was active, constantly exercising and playing sports.
Hanna, an engineer, said his family went out of its way to prepare special foods, including fish and chicken, for McCullum during the fast periods. McCullum disputes that. The family served meat early in his stay, he said, but that ended during the fast period.
He said he never got breakfast and his first food of the day usually was a small piece of bread with cucumbers and cheese that he would take to school for lunch. There was a late-afternoon dinner consisting of beans, vegetables and sometimes fish, and a snack of bread later in the evening.
McCullum sometimes bought food, but at one point was reduced to stealing it from a supermarket. He was caught, but the store accepted the small amount of money he had and let him go. Still, McCullum did not complain to his parents. His father suspects he may have fallen victim to Stockholm syndrome, in which people start to feel a sense of loyalty to those who victimize them.
McCullum's parents first sensed that something was amiss shortly before Christmas, when they got e-mails from their son and one of his teachers about seeking a new host family. They also saw a picture of him on Facebook indicating he had lost a lot of weight.
In early January, the teacher sent another e-mail saying McCullum was "in bad shape" and "really, really NEEDS to go home." The McCullums said AFS provided false assurances that he had seen a doctor and was in excellent health.
The McCullums are considering a lawsuit. David McCullum expressed concern about the long-term physical and psychological effects on his son. "Someone needs to be held accountable, and I would like someone to say, 'I'm sorry.'"
Despite the ordeal, he has not soured on foreign travel: He wants to visit Zimbabwe this summer as part of a volunteer program to build homes and trails.
Copyright 2008 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. Link to the full article is here.
"I" - Where to start? [: I guess you just didn't read my earliest entries. The first question I have for you is this: when did I point out any of the pictures and say "that's how I want to look?" The answer is that I didn't. In fact, I haven't seen anyone who looks exactly the way that I'd like to. Why? Everyone is different. I'm not trying to say that I haven't seen anyone who is beautiful or handsome. They all are. I just mean that I have yet to come across an image that I really admire and wouldn't mind having that exact figure for myself.
I have several friends who are my height or taller who weigh less than me. Specifically, one is 5'8'' and 94lbs and the other is 5'9'' and 111lbs. They both look fantastic to me. Not bone skinny, but no one would call them "average." I like that zone. It's the unquestionably thin area. It's part of the reason I'm aiming for 99lbs. Sounds about right. (If you haven't noticed this either, I've been adjusting my goal weight throughout my blog. When I get somewhere I like it'll probably change again.)
Also, you're almost two inches taller than me and a few pounds lighter... not to mention the fact that you have no idea what my body type is, ethnicity, etc.. My point is that I believe it'd be pretty hard for you to judge what my ideal weight would be. Just like I can't do the same for you. You said you looked good around 122lbs and I have to believe that. Hey, maybe when I hit that weight I'll like what I see too. But as of now I'm still a size 9 US pants with love handles and saddle bags. I'm going to keep losing weight.
I've mentioned several times that I love the fact that I have to do little to no exercise. Embarrassingly enough, I have a few health problems that prohibit me from being able to enjoy most of the activities that other people can partake in (namely asthma, I have to use my aspirator daily and I always carry a rescue inhaler.) What I'm doing has worked well enough so far. I don't mind what I'm burning (fat, lean muscle, my soul, etc.) as long as it gives me something to track. As stated in my first posts, a majority of the reason why I'm doing this is to document my symptoms, monitor my progress, and see how it all boils down. (No, this blog isn't the only thing I use - that'd be silly - but I thought it'd be interesting to make. Might as well support people on their journey while I record mine.) If I like how I look at the end of it all then maybe I'll stick with it. If I liked how I looked somewhere along the way, maybe I'll aim to get back up to that weight. I'm not sure yet. I have yet to look in the mirror and see myself at a weight I'm content with.
You also have to keep in mind that I'm not starving every day. I'd probably be losing weight a lot faster if I really stuck to less than 500 calories a day. Realistically, I have days where I do eat normally. I even have days where I eat way more than I know I should. This is a big part of the reason why I need to buckle down and work at it.
Lastly, "I don't understand how you are unaware of the fact that 99 pounds at your height would simply look terrible." Again, how can you say so? You've never seen me. Maybe your boyfriend was upset by your weight loss because it looked awkward on you, but that doesn't mean it'll be so strange on me. Time will tell. I'm new at this game. The numbers keep changing, and they will until I find out what I'm happy with. (Did I mention I save tons of money that would otherwise be spent on food?)
P.S. Sorry if my response seems a little heated, I don't intend for it to be... and I also understand that your comment was just a suggestion. I hope you can see my thought process a little better now.
Now for some thinspo! I'd like to start with a small example. The picture with cheerleaders is a weight I honestly consider (in my opinion) not to be thin enough. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder!
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